This year, our Christmas card was a stamp of Mary. Megan challenged me (Lance) to write a poem for the card. To be honest I was a bit reluctant, but after a nights sleep I got excited about the challenge. Megan has a much higher opinion of my poetry than I do. But sometimes you just have to trust your wife knows something about you that that you may not know about yourself 😉

Admittedly, the poem is a bit darker. Yet, I couldn’t help but think how hard it was for Mary to be the misunderstood mother to a misunderstood Messiah. We see her story through the lens of the joy filled resurrection. She was living a normal life then was thrown into a life altering situation that is mostly dark history for us, but to her quite real and all consuming. I’m not convinced Mary had any foreknowledge of what was coming. She didn’t know she would be fleeing to Egypt or she would have left sooner, but this also shows her deep trust in the Yahweh and the equally deep character that made God choose her to hold this incredible responsibility. I mean, look at all the art we see about Mary. She looks so happy and gentle all the time, but it had to be super stressful at times.

I was keenly aware that I was walking along side the song “Mary Did You Know?,” but I wanted to reflect more on the human aspect rather than the salvation aspect of the untold story of Mary’s experience and really, our human existence is full of suffering. I have to assume that Mary had more than her fair share. I find, in the evangelical world of which I live and work, we often find it quite difficult to reflect on suffering without changing the subject or shifting in our seats uncomfortably. We often say something like “the Lord is in charge” or “joy comes in the morning.” To be honest, this has come into sharp focus for me as I have had to deal with my own pain of the war in Ukraine as well as have no good answer for my suffering Ukrainian friends.

However, in reflecting on Mary and her entangled story with Jesus, I am reminded that suffering is not the end. Even with all the difficulty, we are able to look at her story through the lens of the resurrection and see God’s faithfulness to a helpless baby that happened to be the savior of the world and taken care of by an ordinary young woman and carpenter of not so ordinary character. They must have had an absolutely wild ride of a life. Can’t wait to ask all my questions to Mary face to face some day.

I hope you enjoy.

Questions to Mary

From the beginning to very end, 
You were there, it is written
Painful joy at birth, 
With death, grief stricken

Your story so pivotal 
Impossible to comprehend
Without it my life
Or most of it would wholly upend

But wow! Mother of the Son of God
What a noble, grand title.
Pray, let me tone down the reverence
And ponder for a while

Was the angel's visit enough
To endure the shame of scandal?
"Adultery" shadowing Joseph's gaze,
Was it more than you could handle?

Did you tell your father all,
did he too have a dream to understand?
Or being blight on the family name,
Did anger burn, rage quiver in his hand? 

All the pictures I have seen
Show you happy in the stable
But was there any angst you felt
As animals shared your table?

When at His face you gazed
As brand new mothers do,
Did you recognize any features
Did He look at all like you?

In the silence, then the crying
In the middle of the night,
Did you find it frustrating 
When He wouldn't latch just right?

Were you ok with the rabble,
Brought by Jesus birth
Strange foreigners from afar
Shepherds smelling of animal and earth.

When news came to Egypt
Of all the young ones slain;
In agony of friend's children,
Did you feel at least partly to blame?

As a toddler did He play?
Did He grope for things absurdly,
Or was He more refined,
mannerisms other worldly?

What about when you rebuked Him,
Like that one time at the temple?
Did He always give it back,
Or in understanding was he gentle?

Better than the rest, you knew him
Thirty years living in your shadow
Darkness, is this time for us
For you only to intimately know

But you seemed to have a clue
With the lack of wedding wine.
So was young Jesus like other boys,
Or was his housework divine?

When his purpose became public
And he stayed away from home
Did you feel left out, forgotten,
When with misfits he would roam?

I wonder, was it painful 
As Jesus pointed to others
While you waited for Him outside,
He asking who is my mother, my brothers?

When you saw him on the cross,
Did pain-filled doubt creep inside?
"Blessed are you" now a joke
Because messiahs can't have died.

From joyful promise of messiah 
Hope growing in your womb,
To bringing once joyful spices
For anointing the dead in a tomb.

I guess what I am asking,
If I may be so bold,
Were you like the rest of us?
Or was there deeper faith to hold?

The Mother of the Son of God
The more I look, the more I see
A pain filled journey for you
Meant a grace filled life for me. 

Did you know this from the start?
In the middle, did you get a clue?
Was there a post-grave visit,
A tender moment meant just for two?

Even though no answers given
To my questions of you and Son,
You were picked for a reason
All I can say is, job well done.

Formational Book Review by Lance

5/5 Stars

“To be conceited of doing one’s duty is then a sign of how little one does it, and how little one sees what a contemptible thing it is not to do it. Could any but a low creature be conceited of not being contemptible? Until our duty becomes to us common as breathing, we are poor creatures.”

This fairy tale follows two foolish young girls and their very foolish parents. One is a princess who is aggressively spoiled rotten and the other a poor farm girl who only hears praise from her parents and is incredibly conceited. A very mysterious and wise old woman shows up and uses her knowledge and bit of magic in her curious house in an attempt to reform the girls and maybe even their parents.

Reading as a Disciple:

“But the wise woman had, in truth, heard the first sound of her running feet, and stopped and turned, waiting. What with running and crying, however, and a fall or two as she ran, the princess never saw her until she fell right into her arms—”

No matter how many smart books I read or techniques that I implement in my pursuit of being a disciple of Jesus, I find myself being either or both of the daughters.  In the end, I need divine guidance to show me the real depravity of my conceit and entitlement. This is a parable that helps to console with hope the part of me that understands the deficiency in me and my easy forgetfulness of this deficiency. It also confronts my pride and reminds me that I have a guide that will allow my sinful nature cause me pain while working a more beautiful creation in me. I have a wise counselor who continually and creatively pursues me and draws me toward my true self away from the false self.

Reading Pastorally:

“As she grew up, everybody about her did his best to convince her that she was Somebody; and the girl herself was so easily persuaded of it that she quite forgot that anybody had ever told her so, and took it for a fundamental, innate, primary, first-born, self-evident, necessary, and incontrovertible idea and principle that SHE WAS SOMEBODY… in this odd country there was a huge number of Somebodies. Indeed, it was one of its oddities that every boy and girl in it, was rather too ready to think he or she was Somebody; and the worst of it was that the princess never thought of there being more than one Somebody—and that was herself.”

Macdonald does a great job weaving “nature/nurture” into this story.  Both the girls have a will to do what is right or wrong, however they are also influenced by the faulty care of their parents.  In the end, misguided “love” created two atrociously selfish little creatures. Both sets of parents, in their discomfort or blindness, gave the wrong base idea to their daughters; that they were the only somebody. A person being a person is not for the sake of their own specialness. The reason for personhood in the story is a bit hidden. But it is very clear that each is loved by the Wise Woman and the more they know it, the more that transformational love is shown to others.

“…you (parents) are sufficiently punished by the work of your own hands. Instead of making your daughter obey you, you left her to be a slave to herself; you coaxed when you ought to have compelled; you praised when you ought to have been silent… She is your crime and your punishment. Take her home with you, and live hour after hour with the pale-hearted disgrace you call your daughter.”

 This hit home for me.  How many times have I only focused my care for people on being “somebody” in this world without reenforcing the reality that they are not the only somebody in the room. If we care for others without the context of character growth and being a person in a community, we can unintentionally and unfortunately cause harm to those in our care.

Formational Reading:

“I could tell you a great deal more concerning them all, but I have already told more than is good for those who read but with their foreheads, and enough for those whom it has made look a little solemn, and sigh as they close the book.”

The very last paragraph of the book is a glimpse into George Macdonald’s philosophy on what story should produce in a person. And I can say the first time I read this story I was more of a forehead reader. Time and trial, I think, has made me read this story a bit differently this time.  I believe that story should be a large part of our joy building. And I also believe that digesting a story takes practice and effort. I hope I sigh after every book I read.

Other thoughts:

Formationaly speaking, George Macdonald has been a huge influence on me and my view of God, human nature and God’s work of redemption. He is known for being a large influence on Tolkien and C.S. Lewis with his fairy tales and sermons.  In some circles George Macdonald has been a figure of controversy.  Towards the end of his life his theology had a hard universalist bend. More specifically, in Lance paraphrase, through our own hell of depravity and the consuming fire of God’s love, over time, everyone will eventually yield to the love of God and accept His embrace. As Paul Young (who wrote “The Shack”) said in the documentary “Restoring the Shack”, (again in Lance paraphrase) “I don’t necessarily hold to George MacDonald’s view on hell, but I hope he is right.”

Other George Macdonald Favorites:

• Lilith
• Phantastes
• The Princess and the Goblin
• The Princess and Curdie
• The Shadows
• Back of the North Wind

Also

• “George Macdonald: An Anthology 365 Readings” by C.S. Lewis

“Shit happens” ~Forrest Gump

Since this has been a crazy season for most of the world and the future seems uncertain, we thought it important to be memorizing some of God’s Word, especially on hope.

We challenged our staff to memorize these verses, see if you can get them down in a week.

1. Jeremiah 29:11- “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.”
2. Isaiah 40:31- but those you hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
3. Philippians 1:6- being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
4. Romans 15:13- May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
5. Romans 8:24-25- For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
6. Romans 8:28- And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
7. Psalm 3:2-6- Many are saying of me, “God will not deliver him.” But you, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high. I call out to the Lord, and he answers me from his holy mountain. I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me. I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side.
8. Colossians 3:1-2- Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set you minds on things above, not on earthly things.
9. Isaiah 43:1-2- But now, this is what the Lord says- he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.
10. Psalm 147:11- the Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love.
11. Deuteronomy 31:8- The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”
12. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18- Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs then all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
13. James 1:2-4- Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
14. Jeremiah 17:7- “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”
15. Lamentations 3:22-25- Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;

“A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit”

~Ancient Greek Proverb

-John Oliver Washington 

-Part time stay at home dad, Part time tattoo artist

I met John quite a few years ago while he lived in Ukraine with his family.  At the time he had just finished his (second) Discipleship Training School (DTS), an introductory school to Youth With a Mission. I instantly loved this guy. His desire to serve others and care for orphans was evident and infectious. At the time of this interview, he and his family were back living in England, where they are from. Here is a chat that we did over social media:

Where have you lived from when you were born till now?

England, America/Bosnia (only 6 months, DTS ? ), England, Switzerland/Egypt (another DTS), England, Ukraine , England 

So mainly England and Ukraine?

Have you always been artistic? Or was it something that you learned?

I have always liked drawing but never felt like I was good enough or a natural at it. 

But it was the subject that I did the best in at school.

As an adult, only since I started getting into tattooing, have I found a style of art and painting that I’m passionate about. It’s important that art has a purpose (so for me my paintings to be tattoos for people makes it worth spending the time creating them.) 

As to whether my art is learned or a gifting I feel like it’s a mix of both. ?

What purpose do you think your art serves?

??

It provides an income for me and my family. It brings joy to me as the creator and also in a different way to the receiver.  

I think with tattoos for the wearer it can bring increased self esteem and even to some degree identity.

What kinds of conversations happen when you tattoo someone?

Mostly it’s kinda small talk, chatting about the customer’s job or life. The pain of getting tattooed is talked about a lot! 

I have returning customers who I get to know better and they become similar to friends. We chat about life and all sorts of things from politics to faith and everything else pretty much. 

I like to take the opportunity when it comes up to talk about Jesus but I don’t ever force it into conversation.

If you could say something to Christians who struggle with the morality of tattooing, what would you say?

Hmmmmm. 

Probably just “oh well, different strokes for different folks”

Something like that.

If they wanted a discussion about it I would tell them to look online, there are plenty of people spouting their opinions there.

?

I feel it’s a hard one because it’s like a lots of things in life. I feel like it comes under the personal convictions banner. Great for one, shambles for another. 

I would also say that in my experience as I have traveled this journey with God, talking to him about tattooing. My understanding is this. 

Tattoos are skin deep. Just flesh and blood. These things will soon all perish just as our bodies will. Our tattoos are no more eternal than the clothes we wear or the hair on our heads.

In the context of you living out your Christianity, how has your work impacted your Christian walk? Have you learned anything about who God is and who you are?

I have a better understanding that God is a provider in all things. In missions it was easy to see we relied on him for money and money came (and other stuff of course). But with tattooing God provides cool customers who want the sort of tattoos that I like doing. He provides through giving me the ability to do the job, be creative and skillful.

He is in the every detail when we seek him and often his grace covers the times when we forget to ask. 

My work has given me a better understanding of God’s Grace. 

50 or so years ago the church in the West could not have conceived that God would bless and provide for tattooing but here I am and I see his provision. It’s undeniable. I pray for specific things and he enables me or brings those things to pass. It shows me a side to God that he is outside our boxes of cultural confinement. He blesses us in the details but I’m not sure the details matter to him so much. His pursuit is me. And I see that and my great fullness increases.

I am in a better place with God and spend more time with him daily than I have in years.

That’s a lot but doesn’t even begin to explain any of it really. 

Sorry.

Do you have any more comments or anything you would like someone reading this to know?

God loves us. Jesus is very important. Faith in him is everything. Thank you. For reading ? Over and out, Bye bye, Paka paka, Done Fini!

Awesome! Thanks for your openness. I really love what you are doing. It has been a huge honor for me to do this. Blessings on you and your family.